Gerald Vest: Who is this "I"?    
 Who is this "I"?5 comments
picture3 Apr 2013 @ 13:22, by Gerald Vest

Why can’t we let go of frustration and pain? We would not willingly live with another person who tormented us this way. Perhaps we need to ask ourselves what is causing this pain, and whether it need be endured. Are we harboring an unnecessary and undesirable visitor? Tarthang Tulku, Knowledge of Freedom – Time to Change, p.324

Master Tulku is such a Trip or Journey for us as we learn about “ourselves” the “I” and begin to see how we make ourselves miserable. What will be our next Trip? ”I” turned 78 clock years on the first day of Spring and am still questioning; however, when “I” asks Why? Why This? Why That? Perhaps we are looking for a single cause or solution to our problems or narrowing down the many possibilities. Our “I” is such a skillful performer that “it” (I or me) will spend much of our life looking for a pill or quick fix of instant gratification and an outlet to compensate for the pain and suffering that comes with unanswered questions and incomplete answers about this “I”.

A personal example of this questioning “I”-

Recently, “I” had a bike spill while speeding through a parking lot and not seeing the cement barricade, my bike and “I” stopped cold while gravity took over as the physical-mental-emotional-spiritual “I” is thrust over the bars on to the cement walk way—thank you God for the soft landing. “ I” also had some help, much like my love of pole vaulting as a kid and young adult traveling through space, always seeking higher Heights—falling becomes instinctual. As a vaulter “I” learned to fall so this injury served as a wake-up call, Brushed “I” Off, healed my bruises and muscles with massage, reiki & acupuncture—speeds up the healing processes. Some body-mind-spirit pain remained of course to remind “I” to be conscious and aware, manage his stress with loving-Kindness and know that our whole life is for learning and Living. And, all of our “I’s” are playing out their lives the best they know how. The I-Ching reminds us in the commentaries about our evolution as human beings—NO JUDGMENT & NO BLAME, Brings Success!

During my young adult life and now, “I” has been a Seeker after Truth (SAT) and loving this Life Journey & experience beyond words. Professor Tulku initiated several of our SAT members into the Nyingma Lineage following several retreats while learning about how to Free ourselves, this “I” from power & control, judge & Jury, Fearful & Insecure, and, undeveloped & unfulfilled human beings. However, all of Tarthang’s practical health Resources, meditations and Instructions offer us continued guidance and challenges. See my Selected Bibliography and the resources “I” has been studying, exploring, embodying and sustaining.

Thank you my Friend and Teacher for your beautiful inspirational guidance and Support for me and for my Students, Colleagues and currently with Injured Warriors & their Families. [link]

Therefore, we may want to question ourselves, get to know and love this “I”— Who is this “masked man-woman” who controls our lives, our health and our Relationships?

When one realizes just how “empty” the ego is, one ceases identifying with it, defending it, worrying about it, and this in turn releases one from the chronic suffering and unhappiness that comes from defending something that isn’t there.

As “Wei Wu Wei” put it.

Why are you Unhappy?

Because 99.9% of everything you think,
And everything you do,
Is for your self,
And there isn’t one.


The Essential Ken Wilber – An Introductory Reader, Shambhala, p. 124,



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5 comments

5 Apr 2013 @ 15:39 by shreepal : My problem of my
The difficulty in this whole exercise is that we try to know or understand this "I" with the instrument that is this "I". We can never penetrate this "I" with the only help of "our" I. One has to almost die - get somehow out of this I - to know this stuff. But is it ever possible for a human being, a human being as he or she is, to get out of this structure? Not by ordinary means, the means of our thinking process or mental exercise. Then, what is the way out? There are certain extra-ordinary exercises that individuals have undertaken - from age to age; from country to country; from religion to religion - and came out with "objective" conditions - conditions that could be tested by our science or by our ordinary humanity that are nothing less than death: they are pronounced dead. And, they come to life again - for all to see and verify. They tell and describe what this "I" is. They do not depend on I to know the "I". But these exercises are not simple to be performed; it takes many "lives" (of course, if you bring a faith in such things) to master these exercises. What is the solution within your reach? Pray to "your" God; be content with what you have got or what have been able to become; be good to everything (!!) that is out to you, foreign to you - animals, humans, environment, creatures, plants, enemies, friends, wife, childern, the whole universe. It is your feeling that matters; it is your conduct that matters. It for your own good. You may not understand it but it is the only key that is in your possession. That is all. And there is nothing more that one can do in this mysterious field (mystery is that reality that you do not know yet).  


5 Apr 2013 @ 18:59 by jerryvest : Thank you Shreeepal for your
wise response to the I....this I is very much in charge and is always in contradiction with it's True Nature--that of Witness and Void as "I" understands and responds to the dilemna. Appreciate the many exercised introduce by Tathang Tulku and others to develop and have an Honest-Open, Accepting, Allowing Mind of Loving Kindness, without judgment and labels.  


10 Apr 2013 @ 17:19 by jerryvest : "I" forgot to mention that during many
years of practice and with such outstanding teachers, life's mysteries begin to open up to us. Seems we get what we need to continue this evolution and become One with All that Is. Am so happy to know that there is more to life than wanting or wishing for more. :)  


12 Apr 2013 @ 18:04 by vaxen : Perhaps...
The English word "I" has been misunderstood. I and ego (Gk. Eigo) are not synonymous. Take a look at the Rune Isa, symbolic of the 'Bifrost Bridge.' One must cross the bridge to get to the other side, either way.

In the New Testament the Xristos is made to say: "Eigo Eimi Kai Alpha Kai To Omega."

NUNC PRO TUNC PRAETEREA PRETEREA

Always great to read your articles, knowing that there are real hu-man beings alive on earth at this time helping others to cross over...

Thanks for everything you, and yours, are doing, Jerry...  



13 Apr 2013 @ 12:57 by jerryvest : Thanks for the "ego" & "I"
clarification and for the kind and thoughtful words, my friend.  


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