|11 Oct 2004 @ 11:44, by Greg Sherk|
How to use spirituality as a tool to improve the life of a damaged man?
In no particular order:
1) Men of today are closer to a right of center political viewpoint. This is purely a safety/comfort issue easily understood by all political commentators: Those on the right are willing to listen to men. Those on the left reject a man’s right to have feelings by defining all mens’ feelings as whatever the nearest woman wants them to be. As this is a function of today’s gender politics, it will eventually change.
Therefore, any spiritual path must include sensitivity to rightist viewpoints without driving the left away.
What overall guiding portion of spirituality allows such inclusion? The answer must be honor. That portion of spirit which focuses on honor is relatively free of political overtones while being easily seen by those with rightist views.
2) Men of this and the previous century who create a spiritual path seem to include Jungian views as a core component of the path. When Bill W. created the twelve step program of AA he used Jungian concepts as the core of the spiritual path.
Therefore, the Jungian view of spirituality and personal growth must also be a core component of the spiritual tool.
3) Men of today are very interested in the appearance of power. Not appearing weak is more important than life itself for the average man.
Therefore, my spiritual tool must include a means of controlling a man’s own view of power and weakness.
4.1) Most men will sacrifice a significant portion of their own best interest for the apparent best interest of their wife and children. These men will not think this through in order to see the actual best interest of their family; it is only the apparent best interest as he sees it which matters to him.
Therefore, my spiritual tool must include a means of identifying the actual best interests of the man and his family.
4.2) Further to the above: Almost without exception men of today have stopped listening to gender based reporting. As all of today’s gender based reporting is either “blame the man” or “woman only” he has an active interest in not listening to it. Hearing the gender reporting hurts him....
Therefore, my spiritual tool must include a means of interesting the man in what is, within gender, and this must be done without even the least hint of blame.
5) In today’s society male-only is directly equated with discrimination and evil: It’s corollary female-only is considered to be good and part of a fair society. This confuses and annoys almost the entire male population. Furthermore, this is a direct function of the path we choose to correct women’s problems. It must change and will, sometime....
Therefore, my spiritual tool must be fully inclusive of women even as it focuses on men.
6) All efforts over to create gender equity over the last century and a fifth have used blaming men and shaming men as the only tools to create change. While blame and shame are powerful tools for creating short term change, when used long term they are disastrous.
Therefore, my spiritual tool must reject both blame and shame.
7) The overriding problem of misandry must be dealt with: This form of contempt infests and controls all of today’s society. In genocide, where more than three in four victims are young men, and society’s only response is “Men can run. All effort goes to women.” Few see this as the extreme and dangerous form of contempt and devaluation of male life that it is. That is a threat to us all.
My spiritual tool must include counter-contempt as a core component.
These seven points are a starting place. Here I put them in order of importance:
1. My spiritual tool must include counter-contempt of men as a core, heart and soul component. This must be done without contempt of women.
2. My spiritual tool must reject all shame and blame.
3. My spiritual tool must increase a man’s feeling of personal power.
4. My spiritual tool must focus on honor.
5. My spiritual tool must include Jungian views as a core component of the path.
6. My spiritual tool must include a means of identifying the actual best interests of the man and his family.
7. My spiritual tool must be fully inclusive of women even as it focuses on men.
I now have my starting point. As in the earlier article I find I must focus on both spirituality and gender. I now know how to do that.
As these seven points match nicely with my epistle, I can say that in writing this starting point I am correctly interpreting the will of God.