2001-11-03 07:41:59 -- http://www.bigfatbaby.com/newfun/paw-walk.gif
AM BEGGING FOR SOME HELP HERE
Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I cannot accept, and the
wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill
today because they pissed me off.
And also, help me to be careful of the toes
I step on today as they may be connected
to the butt that I may have to kiss tomorrow.
Help me to always give 100% at work...
12% on Monday
23% on Tuesday
40% on Wednesday
20% on Thursday
5% on Fridays
And help me to remember...
When I'm having a really bad day,
and it seems that people are trying to piss me off,
that it takes 42 muscles to frown and
only 4 muscles to extend my middle finger
and tell them to bite me!
A man walks into the doctor's office with a serious problem!
"Doctor, I've had problems with silent gas emissions.
At home, work, and even at church, I release tons of silent farts everywhere I go!
As a matter of fact I've had three sitting here talking to you.
What are we going to do?"
The doctor replies
"The first thing we're going to do is check your hearing"
One Call Was All
Get those hands off that keyboard! Yes, I'm talking to You!
Now listen up!
You are being cited for:
Involvement in an Illegal Operation,
threatening your computer,
striking keys, and especially,
for spending way too many hours sitting in front of that screen!
You have been caught red handed, thanks to a tip from a fellow computer addict. You should be ashamed of yourself. I know you have better things to do.
Your actions would normally result in a severe sentence. However, you will be released if you help us prosecute other computer addicts. You need only to send this page to them.
Now get up off that chair and go outside! It's for your own good! And I don't want to see you again, you understand?
Now move it! NOW!
Hilarious luv poem
Roses are red,
or are they blue?
Hell I don't know
but I do like you.
I love you more
than my truck's tires.
Yer more useful to me than my
old rusty pliers.
You cook a good deer
and fry some good eggs,
just wish you'd shave that
hair off yer legs.
If you decide not to do it, Pumkin Face,
It's okay, I'll still feel the same,
I'll just keep on tellin my buddies,
yer up fer a part in Planet of the Apes.
Yer my pride and joys,
What a lady!
But hows come we do it
only when it's my payday?
When I ran over ya with my truck,
you didn't even say "ouch."
And you are so cute,
wiping your boogers under the couch.
I hope we stay together,
at least a couple more days-
cuz I'm really horney
and I want to get laid.
"Ten Reasons To Go To Work Naked"
Men and Their Tools!
The Everchanging Mother
now breathe and drink soma dis hehe
A number of frogs were traveling through the woods. Two of them fell into a deep pit. All the other frogs gathered around the pit. When they saw how deep the pit was, they told the two frogs that they were as good as dead.
The two frogs ignored the comments and tried to jump up out of the pit with all of their might. The other frogs kept telling them to stop, that they were as good as dead.
Finally, one of the frogs took heed to what the other frogs were saying and gave up. He fell down and died.
The other frog continued to jump as hard as he could. Once again, the crowd of frogs yelled at him to stop the pain and just die. He jumped even harder and finally made it out.
When he got out, the other frogs said, "Did you not hear us?" The frog explained to them that he was deaf. He thought they were encouraging him the entire time.
This story teaches two lessons:
There is the power of life and death in the tongue.
An encouraging word to someone who is down can lift them up and help them make it through the day.
A destructive word to someone who is down can be the push over the edge. Be careful of what you say.
Speak life to those who cross your path. Anyone can speak words that can rob another of the spirit to push forward in difficult times.
Special is the individual who will take the time to encourage another.
Be kind to others.
RECOMMENDED ONLY BY SINDY
SIGNED AND HAVE FUN AND BE IN DANCE WITH SINDY
LAUGHING IS HEALTHY SAYS SINDY
ALL THE BEST SAYS SINDY [link] hehe [link]