|MEGATRENDS: Astronaut Jones Trending|
16 comments14 Mar 2009 @ 20:29 by vaxen : And so...
You've lead the way once more into time's trance ending flow...
Beyond the bubbled illusions of cyber-space and virtuality...
In simplicity es veritas...
15 Mar 2009 @ 06:38 by vaxen : It's...
a good thing that I do not have a 45. R2-45 is far too tempting. Guess I could use my 9mm Glock, though, if I had one...
15 Mar 2009 @ 15:27 by vaxen : Free Republic
"...They sailed across an unknown ocean, to an unknown land, to establish a country free of kings and tyrants..."
All well and good, but it took 10% of Patriots to drag the rest of the Colonists to Liberty.
Free Republic is the premier online gathering place for independent, grass-roots conservatism on the web. We're working to roll back decades of governmental largesse, to root out political fraud and corruption, and to champion causes which further conservatism in America. And we always have fun doing it. Hoo-yah!
15 Mar 2009 @ 16:28 by vaxen : Sir Jed Kennedy...
Yup "The Lion of the Senate (Mwuhahahahaha!)" to be knighted by Queen Elisabeth!
March 5, 2009 at 12:37 pm
I know we're supposed to lay off him because he's ill and he now thinks his name is "Jed Tennedy" and all that but, hey, the Kennedys never layed off on anyone, ever, so tough noogies for him. Here's one from the Artboy Archives; a look back at Jed's early years, excerpted from a longer series called
TED KENNEDY-LONG SWIM TO FREEDOM
Chapter Two: "A Visit from the Docktor"
Rated "R" for language and Kennedy-related situations.
It wasn't his fault. It never was. He was only drunk and speeding in a residential area while driving without a licence, which as a Kennedy he was perfectly entitled to do, but the cops still put on their sirens and chased him anyway. He'd driven straight home, like anyone else would, and pulled into the driveway and shut off the lights and crawled as far under the front seat as he could go, like any law-abiding citizen, but, somehow, the cops had still found him and even after he used the secret code words that always get Kennedys out of trouble –"Do you know who I am?" - they'd still arrested him and now he was in a jam –again.
Ted took another belt of Night Train. Mmmm. Fortified. He recalled his father's furious anger.
"This is the last time, Tad! The last time! I told you what would happen if you fucked up again, didn't I?"
"Yes sir, Your Excellency Mr Ambassador, Sir".
"And did you hear what I told you?"
"Yes sir, Your Excellency Mr Ambassador, Sir".
"But you didn't understand, did you, Tad? You heard me but you didn't understand me. Now, why is that? Maybe there's something wrong with you, Tad. Maybe there's something wrong inside your head, Tad, and that's why YOU ALWAYS FUCK EVERYTHING UP!"
"SHUT UP! Don't 'Dad' me! Don't say another word. I'm going to fix this problem, Tad - for good. I'm going to help you, since you can't help yourself. I've got someone here, a doctor who can make you better. You want to be better, don't you Tad?"
A white coated man, who reminded Ted a little of the actor Gregory Peck, entered the room, followed by a shorter, hulking figure.
"Tad, this is Herr Docktor Mengele and his assistant, Herr Bormann. The doctor's an old friend of mine. I've had him come up here all the way from Brazil to help you".
"Gut to meet you, young mann" hissed the Docktor. "You are a most handsome specimen. Haff you perhaps ein twin brother or sister? Nein? Too bad - perhaps you may haff been useful in mein ozzer areas uff research".
Please God. Save me.
"Do you think you can help him, Doc?" asked Old Joe.
"Ach, ja! I have mit cases uf zis nature much experienze. Vell, let us commenze to azzist zis young mann. Bormannn! Herr Ambassador! Greifen Sie ihn! Seize him!"
His father and the second hulking figure grabbed Ted and hurled him on to the table, holding him down with arms like, well, like guys who were really strong, I guess.
"Yeep" Ted squealed.
"It's okay, er…son" his father said soothingly, tightly gripping a handful of Ted's thick, dark hair. "Don't worry. Dad's here".
Ted popped open another Colt .44 and shivered at the memory.
"Ja, keep quite still, jung mann" said the Docktor. "It iz a most simple und quick procedure. Soon, no more pain. No more confusion. You vill like that, yes?"
The Docktor swabbed Ted's forehead with alcohol and jabbed him with a little novocaine. Nice, thought Ted.
Mengele produced a simple wooden hand drill and bit from his lab coat pocket. The frenzied German jammed it between Ted's goggling, terrified eyes and began to drill furiously.
"So! Ve are so soon where ve vant to be. Let uz haff a little feel around…" he began to probe inside Ted's skull with an urgent finger. "Somezing? Nein. Somezing? Nein….hmmmm."
Mengele probed more deeply, swirling the exploratory digit restlessly around. "Ach! No, nuzzing. Nuzzing at all". He withdrew the gooey finger and licked it clean.
"Herr Ambassador, I detect nuzzing in ze head of zis boy except ein arrangement of rudimentary nerve ganglia, such as you find in ze more primitive invertebrates, such as Lumbricus terrestris, ze common earthworm or nightcrawler. I cannot vizout straw make bricks, Joe. There iz zimply here nothing for me to werk mit".
"You mean you can't help him?"
"Nein, Exzellenz. Zis case iz beyond even mein powers. He cannot be cured. He must remain as Gott haz made him".
"Oh, well; if that's how it has to be. Dänke, Josef. And you too, Martin. I'll cable the rest of your fee to the ODESSA account, as we discussed, and some of my people will help you get home safely".
"Home?" the Docktor sighed. "Mein Heimat? If only it vere so…"
He quickly plugged the hole in Ted's skull with a little dab of Play-Do.
"Komm, Bormann; ve must go. Und you, young mann" he said to Ted, playfully slapping his cheek "You are vun lucky little fellow, ja?"
After the Germans had left, Ted gingerly sat up on the table. His head hurt. He was confused.
"Too fucking dumb even to be lobotomized – now that's one for the books" muttered the Ambassador.
"What – what are you gonna do with me?" whispered Ted fearfully.
"I don't have a choice, Tad. With your, er, special qualifications, there's only one place for you".
Oh no. Please no.
"That's right, Tad. You're going to be Senator from Massachusetts – forever".
Can't you just see all the Democrats on NCN creaming in their jeans? (*Note:Homely Amerikan Expression.)
15 Mar 2009 @ 23:38 by jmarc : QOTD
Doubt ‘til thou canst doubt no more … doubt is thought and thought is life. Systems which end doubt are devices for drugging thought.
— Albert Guerard
Question: What did Rose Kennedy say when she found out that John Jr. died in a plane crash off of Nantucket?
Answer: "Was Ted driving?"
16 Mar 2009 @ 00:18 by vaxen : Heh, heh...
Yeah, that's a good one. The lion of the senate. Ahahahahaha!
16 Mar 2009 @ 03:18 by mortimer : Pod Cars?
Where are the pod cars?
16 Mar 2009 @ 09:05 by vaxen : Meritocracy...
Q: What countries live under meritocracy?
A: This question has not been answered yet.
Invasion of the pod people who came in pod cars from the only planet in existence that is governed solely on the basis of a meritocracy. If you do not merit anything you die...then you are shipped to planet Earth in a podship and once you arrive here you are resurrected by pod people from the planet Pod where there is a meritocracy so...
Twitter me a meritocracy. Maybe Twitter will be the first country on Earth to merit a meritocracy...
Maybe not. The truth is in the Pods which are in the podcars which no one has seen and everyone is wondering: "Where are the frakking pod cars!?
Heya mortimer! ☺
16 Mar 2009 @ 09:26 by vaxen : When?
When Is It Going To Be Enough, America?
March 15, 2009
Believe it or not, this started being about HR875 & S425, but in the writing of it, it's just so much more.
This is about the amazing things happening in this nation,
and the inconcievable tolerance the American public has of it all.
Dear, dear, America,
When is it going to be enough? Haven't you been disrespected, marginalized, misdirected, demeaned, disregarded, ignored, insulted, bullshitted, deliberately misinformed, uninformed, manipulated, controlled, cheated, lied to, poisoned, killed…and generally just plane old screwed for long enough? I'm really starting to wonder about you. Why isn't all that enough for you America? Yoo Hoo! Are you in there?
16 Mar 2009 @ 09:54 by vaxen : Bill Hicks
"Bill Hicks Mandala"
16 Mar 2009 @ 22:10 by vaxen : Lolcats
2 An Lief waz reveeld, n we saw n wer liek "OMG LOOK AT" n we dugg it n rote in hedlien "ETEARNL LIEF WIT FAHTER AND WAZ REVEELD 4 US" - Lolcat Bible
17 Mar 2009 @ 08:35 by vaxen : Heh, heh...
USing another 'new' browser called Jawoco http://www.jawoco.com/ which uses .Net 2 and seems pretty fast. This is my maiden voyage with her so we'll see. Still have to test her in the deep web... but off hand I'd say simple and nice and pretty fast.
Looks like I'll be the only one commenting here for the duration so that's ok. When NCN was new and was pretty much only a chat room (Well, plus all the other stuff and group newsletters) I used to come to the chat room and just talk to myself. A bit odd, I know, but so frakking what? :) It's an odd Verse we live in. Tata...
Twitter me http://twitter.com/vaxen_var while you still can...
18 Mar 2009 @ 00:37 by maxtobin : Calling all space cadets!
A Twit you is not Bro!
Must check the noise in the streets about this 'twitter' thing some time!!
Right now I have had my head in this little corner of the 'verse long enuff.
Off to plant some seeds and get ready for the melt down. Me thinks some folks will go hungry and others may well wake up angry. BUT wake up we pray they do before we are all prey in the do do.
Go for gold captain fantastic. The crew are mostly dumb and numb but for some who are past being angry or pissed about the the state of the stew we are stuck into. What a f****n meal it is, absolutly without nourishment in my view.
I trust your new browser takes you where you need to be hee hee. Blessed be the WE that is the ONE and the MANY expressing the divine "I AM" for eternity.
18 Mar 2009 @ 05:37 by vaxen : Aye, aye!
Everyone will get the chance to wake up out of the trance. Some prefer it to the exigencies of living life on the curl. So be it. Yes the new browser was nice. Jawoco. Liked the name and the fact it is .NET 2.0 based. Not a lot of apps for .NET 3.0 yet though. Keep your chin up, mate. War is hard. Harder still when you didn't start it and have to 'clean up' after the ones who did.
Some agreements are better than others. Seeds, heirlooms needed. Good luck with that and do save some if you can. Monsanto is making Laws! ☺
As far as Twitter goes? I think you'd love it if you spend the time learning how to use it. Especially with your message.
19 Mar 2009 @ 00:58 by a-d : Captain, my Captain!... : )
Me here. The snow is melting now and the EARLY Spring (-feeling) is in the air! Came just home from Bruce's Health & Harvest Shop. He told us people here are going bunkers buying ORGANIC/NON-altered/Heirloom Seeds all they can get their hands on! His Suppliers don't think they can keep up with the demand more than maybe a year! But...don't we have a growing season coming up here?... why can't they grow a s----load of Veggies and take the seeds and dry them for the following seasons/years (to come) Huh???....
On this coming Monday Flathead Community-Something is having a biiiig meeting in some biiig facilities where organizing co-operative Farming groups will be set up/"structured". People here are now MENTALLY Up & Arms already!... Cool! Quite cool!
My truck broke down when we were on our way Home from The Wellness Education Center
So, there we were on the Big Road.... Two guys stopped asking if they could help, but none of them knew anything about Diesel motors. The third ( one quite young ) guy did.
The boys, Dave and Carl (this young guys name)decided to tow us Home. So then that Adventure started... AND our motor got running again... Anyhooo Carl came to our House and I offered him to choose stuff I have knitted. He chose a pair of mittens with open (no-)fingers ( so one can "do" stuff, yet have some warmth to the hands & wrists. And he also chose a Beanie for his Girlfriend and then I sent four jars of my home made Apricot-preserves for his Mom, to which Carl cautiosly asks us how much he owed us for all the stuff he got!... (whadda Sweet- Heart! )" YOUUU don't owe US a single dime!...We owe you, if anything, both D & I said in a chorus! Quite funny. Ahhhh Barter!... don'cha just love it!?
We were all so very happy for this whole Blessed Situation, that evolved from such a dire situation as brake down on the road with MILES to closest OFFICIAL Help. Official Tow would had cost us minimum 200 bucks! His Mom is in to Creative knitting/arts&crafts, so she will give me a call, since I like to network with such people. All in all turned out to be a GREAT day!... So, in hard cash, as the saying goes, this whole event ended up costing us (only) ten bucks ( that D. gave Carl to cover the gas cost. "Everything Else" was "paid" by my Items made in Time-and-Love-effort for Carl's caring-for-his-Fellow-Humans). Nice, eh? I think so.
20 Mar 2009 @ 08:08 by vaxen : Nice A-d!
Yup. The real America. Wonder if I'll ever find it...for real. I'm such a virtual cyberdawg!